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Poll #1527410 This is the first time I've dumped my bike in some years

Fill in the blank: Today, on my way to work, I fell over on my bike and tore the _____ out of my pants.

crap
3(11.1%)
snot
2(7.4%)
heck
6(22.2%)
hell
5(18.5%)
bejeezus
5(18.5%)
knee
5(18.5%)
other (see comments)
1(3.7%)

Though I am not myself badly damaged, my knee is going to have a heck of a bruise and probably some swelling. What should I do with it over the next few days?

Rest it, maybe ice it if it acts up.
0(0.0%)
Gently exercise it to keep it from getting stiff.
0(0.0%)
Limp in an exaggerated fashion to get extra sympathy.
0(0.0%)
Limp only as much as necessary, wincing occasionally.
0(0.0%)
Ibuprofen!
0(0.0%)

And what should I do with the pants?

Repair/patch as best as possible.
0(0.0%)
Use as gardening/painting/around the house pants.
10(38.5%)
Convert into shorts.
7(26.9%)

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Ice and ibuprofen and keep using the knee but go gently. :)

The blank's in the wrong place for how I use the words. I would very definitely put it instead as "tore my pants all to ____", and probably fill in the blank with "pieces".

Hm. But there aren't pieces; there's just a hole, and a bunch of scraped-thin parts. It's not that big a hole, either, or there'd be stronger language in the poll.

Right. In my native idiolect, "all to pieces" is not necessarily used any more literally than "tore the hell out of", although it does tend to imply a fair bit of damage. From what I saw, your pants weren't nearly to the point where I'd use either intensifier, but I'd consider them about equal in strength.

The other point I meant to be making there was that, using equivalent words, I'd more expect "tore all to hell" than "tore the hell out of".

hard choice between 'heck' and 'knee'!

What I would do with the pants would depend heavily on how they were cut. If they're fairly narrow through the thighs I would use them as work-around-the-house pants. If fuller, probably shorts. I'm never satisfied with shorts cut from pants that were narrow through the thighs, but they're more fashionable shorts at the moment, I suppose, so it's entirely possible that your reaction is the opposite. Still, I'd rather have a good pair of shorts or a good pair of work pants than one of the two that isn't so good but is more specific-use.

I'm glad you're okay. One of my students walked in last night with major damage from a spill, including concussion (no helmet - oy) and a broken bone.

Definitely go for the sympathy limps!

Yikes, poor student!

I was wearing my helmet, and I don't think I banged my head. (I don't have a very clear sense of what happened exactly because I was too busy getting out of the middle of the intersection.)

What I did with the pants would depend very much on the cut and fabric.

Oh yikes. I'm glad you're not damaged any worse.

Do the rats need more pants-pieces tubes to crawl through or to hide in?

They are pretty good on hammocks at the moment.

I wonder if chickens like hammocks. I expect not? But perhaps I should try it. Remind me in a month....

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